An article for you, judas

[jazz]

i found this article when i was updating the news section earlier. you'll like it:

http://www.citypages.com/databank/26/1264/article12991.asp (http://www.citypages.com/databank/26/1264/article12991.asp)

[greg]

that's why i get carryout. cut out the middle man.

[Trizzak]

"So I'm fucking her and then all of a sudden she says really loudly, "Hey, come on out." And this fat dude comes stumbling through the bead door, stark naked, stroking his hard-on. I got the hell out of there. Then I went home and took a long shower."
:haha:

[jazz]

i'd hate to deliver pizzas to some parts of this town. i'd be wearing body armor and carrying a glock 10mm. :insecure:

[The Judas Cow]

It's a great job where I live, typical suburbia, tips are ok, people are sane, not a lot of stiffs.

The part where they talk about what is a good tip is true. $3 is an average tip, $4 is good, $5 is great.

You usually get better tips at apartments or condos. Stoners paying with credit cards always give good tips. I've never had anyone answer the door naked, but I did have this one chick, I'd give her an 8 or 9, answer in a thong and bra, gave me a $5 tip too.

[jazz]

i tip pretty damn well, actually. if the pizza's fifteen, i'll let him/her keep the $20. i always like seeing the look of surprise on their face. :eek2:

plus, i don't want people hocking a loog anywhere near my pizza. :insecure:

[The Judas Cow]

Good man Danny :up:

The worst is when the pizza is like $16-$17 and people give you a $20 and ask for a buck or two back. That almost pisses me off more than a stiff.

To be honest, I've never fucked with the pizza of a stiffer, but if I am going to your house and I know that you stiff, I'll take my sweet time. Stop and get gas, maybe run by Wendys, stop at a friends house in your neighborhood and have a smoke.

I also give stiffers the benifit of the doubt most of the time, unless I know you never tip, it could just be a bad week for you, I've had'em myself. Shit happens, but if you make a habit of no tipping and you order a lot of pizza, you will get fucked with.

[jazz]

but if I am going to your house and I know that you stiff, I'll take my sweet time. Stop and get gas, maybe run by Wendys, stop at a friends house in your neighborhood and have a smoke.

exactamundo. it does three things: 1.) keeps the person happy, 2.) it's a nice gesture instead of being a cheap fuck, 3.) you ensure quick delivery, no hocking of loogies.

[The Judas Cow]

I think the movie Fight Club has done wonders for people respecting the food industry peons. Never fuck with a man who controls your food.

[jazz]

nah, i've always tipped well...fight club just reminded me. plus, i've worked in the food industry, so i know how shitty it is.

[The Judas Cow]

You know danny, I think this is the first thread anyone has ever made for me :cry:

[jazz]

i'm glad to have deflowered you.

:ontome:

[The Judas Cow]

:insecure:

:drool:

[Trizzak]

wait...you're supposed to tip the delivery guys?

[bleuMadonna]

LOL!

I always tip pretty well, usually $4 or $5 for a pizza. Hell, they are doing me a favor because I'm being a lazy fuck. It's worth the extra coin when I really don't want to go out. I'm especially generous if the weather is really awful because that has to suck getting out the car in a driving rainstorm or when it's really cold. I gave a guy an extra $10 around Christmas. He was shocked and didn't want to take it at first but I told him it was for the holidays :biggrin:

[jazz]

i wouldn't mind if a chick tipped me with a blowjob. :insecure:

[The Judas Cow]

LOL!

I always tip pretty well, usually $4 or $5 for a pizza. Hell, they are doing me a favor because I'm being a lazy fuck. It's worth the extra coin when I really don't want to go out. I'm especially generous if the weather is really awful because that has to suck getting out the car in a driving rainstorm or when it's really cold. I gave a guy an extra $10 around Christmas. He was shocked and didn't want to take it at first but I told him it was for the holidays :biggrin:

Atta girl :up:


And for the record, I just got back from delivering, and a new low has been reached. I delivered to an appartment, and I could see the place I deliver for from their front door.

Lazy bastards :shame:

[jazz]

Atta girl :up:


And for the record, I just got back from delivering, and a new low has been reached. I delivered to an appartment, and I could see the place I deliver for from their front door.

Lazy bastards :shame:

if people weren't lazy, you'd be serving them at the restaurant, not at their homes. :up:

[bleuMadonna]

Atta girl :up:


And for the record, I just got back from delivering, and a new low has been reached. I delivered to an appartment, and I could see the place I deliver for from their front door.

Lazy bastards :shame:

Wow, that's even lazier than I. The place I like is a half-mile away, which still is lame because I could get in the car, but at least I can't see it from the door, heh.

[The Judas Cow]

True, but come on, just so I could say I did it, I actually threw a rock and hit the pizza place.

That's lazy on a whole new level.

[bleuMadonna]

True, but come on, just so I could say I did it, I actually threw a rock and hit the pizza place.

That's lazy on a whole new level.
:eek2: :eek2: :eek2:

[The Judas Cow]

To be fair, I had a little help, they were on the third floor so I had a little altitude to help the throw.

[jazz]

True, but come on, just so I could say I did it, I actually threw a rock and hit the pizza place.

That's lazy on a whole new level.

you serious? it was that close?

and you wonder why america's so fucking fat.

[jazz]

To be fair, I had a little help, they were on the third floor so I had a little altitude to help the throw.

aww c'mon dude, that was fucking stairs, man.









































:what:

[The Judas Cow]

It was. The apartment complex that it was in backs up to the strip mall my work is in.

We are talking 60-70 yards

[bleuMadonna]

To be fair, I had a little help, they were on the third floor so I had a little altitude to help the throw.
They better have given you a good tip!

[The Judas Cow]

$2

[jazz]

$2 buck's not bad considering the short distance. right?

[bleuMadonna]

$2
How much was the bill?

[The Judas Cow]

$2 buck's not bad considering the short distance. right?
No, its not bad, and the bill was like $23 give or take.

[bleuMadonna]

No, its not bad, and the bill was like $23 give or take.
I would have given you at least $4. Distance shouldn't enter into it because the bill was still $23. :shame:

[jazz]

they're kinda cheap, but not too bad considering what you find out there.

[The Judas Cow]

Yeah, but when it took me 2 min to get there and 2 min to get back, it's not that bad, the ones that piss me off are the dilveries that take 10-15 minutes each way and I only get a dollar. :shame:

Keep tipping them delivery boys though bleu, we apriceate it and we remember it. :up:

[jazz]

plus, if they're lazy enough not to pick up their pizza 60-yards away, you really think they'd have the patience of waiting to break a $5 or a $10?

[bleuMadonna]

Yeah, but when it took me 2 min to get there and 2 min to get back, it's not that bad, the ones that piss me off are the dilveries that take 10-15 minutes each way and I only get a dollar. :shame:

Keep tipping them delivery boys though bleu, we apriceate it and we remember it. :up:
:up:

[The Judas Cow]

plus, if they're lazy enough not to pick up their pizza 60-yards away, you really think they'd have the patience of waiting to break a $5 or a $10?
It was a check.

I hate checks, you always get tipped better in cash.

[jazz]

It was a check.

I hate checks, you always get tipped better in cash.

a check?

:laughing:

[The Judas Cow]

Ugh, it was a bad night too, slow as shit and everyone was doing checks, I only got out of there with like $35 :puke:

[Capt]

I tip whatever money is left from a 20$

pizza usually costs a little bit less than 20$, 15 - 18.. so i just hand my guy a 20

he is pretty fast, smoked weed with him a few times

[jazz]

Ugh, it was a bad night too, slow as shit and everyone was doing checks, I only got out of there with like $35 :puke:

did those idiots have the check pre-filled out or did you have to wait until they filled out the E N T I R E check...field by field?

[bleuMadonna]

It was a check.

I hate checks, you always get tipped better in cash.
I'm far too lazy to bother writing out a check. Blech.

[The Judas Cow]

I tip whatever money is left from a 20$

pizza usually costs a little bit less than 20$, 15 - 18.. so i just hand my guy a 20

he is pretty fast, smoked weed with him a few times

See, thats fine. Just keep the change. Some times it's $5 sometimes it's $3 no big deal, but when you ask for money back from the $20, now you're just being cheep :shame:

[The Judas Cow]

did those idiots have the check pre-filled out or did you have to wait until they filled out the E N T I R E check...field by field?

Oh I had to wait for them to fill out the dollar amount and sign it, cause they forgot what the guy on the phone said.

Fuckers.

[jazz]

Oh I had to wait for them to fill out the dollar amount and sign it, cause they forgot what the guy on the phone said.

Fuckers.

were you stoned? cause if you were that must've felt like forever.

[The Judas Cow]

No. I haven't smoked yet tonight, I was going to do it with some freinds after I got off, but plans changed so... I kinda want to smoke now, but I dont like smoking alone.

[The Judas Cow]

It still feels like forever when you are standing on these people's door steps, in the cold, holding a stack of fucking pizzas in your hand and trying not to act irritated.

[Capt]

See, thats fine. Just keep the change. Some times it's $5 sometimes it's $3 no big deal, but when you ask for money back from the $20, now you're just being cheep :shame:
i dont even carry change around anyway, whenever i get change from a bill i put it in a jar because it adds up quickly and i hate to carry around things that are unneccessary

[Capt]

No. I haven't smoked yet tonight, I was going to do it with some freinds after I got off, but plans changed so... I kinda want to smoke now, but I dont like smoking alone.
smoking alone is the way to go

[The Judas Cow]

It looks like that is the way I will be going tonight whether I like it or not.

so I guess this tokes for you capt :joint:

[Capt]

:up:


i rolled a bunch of joints because i'm going on a ski trip this weekend

i bought 30$ worth of weed(which is the best weed i've had in months) and rolled 9 joints, smoked a few bowls and still have some left

and i bought a bottle of wild turkey :barney:

[The Judas Cow]

Not bad... I need to get a new pipe. I'm smoking out of a make shift one made from aluminum foil, scotch tape and a coke bottle :shame:

[jazz]

smoking alone is the way to go

:up:

[The Judas Cow]

Just cause y'all got no friends :shame:

[jazz]

Not bad... I need to get a new pipe. I'm smoking out of a make shift one made from aluminum foil, scotch tape and a coke bottle :shame:

have you ever just tried denting an aluminum coke can slightly and poking tiny holes?

[The Judas Cow]

Been there done that, that is a method that should only be used in absolute emergencies.

[jazz]

do you have a metal or wooden bowl that you stick on the foil, or are you smoking directly from an aluminum foil-shaped bowl?

[The Judas Cow]

an aluminum foil-shaped bowl, it is in the mouth of the bottle, and then I cut a hole in the side to smoke through.

Its not good but it works.

[jazz]

an aluminum foil-shaped bowl, it is in the mouth of the bottle, and then I cut a hole in the side to smoke through.

Its not good but it works.

what's the difference between an aluminum-foil bowl and an aluminum can?

[The Judas Cow]

The taste, the cans have coloring and such on there, that and smoking out of the end a of a pop can is kinda a pain, not to mention it is harder to keep the weed on there.

I'll post a picture of what I am using later, it's not a bad little design if you are strapped for a smoking apartaus.

But, for now I have to run. My friend called, so I'll be able to smoke out of a real pipe :up: :dude:

[jazz]

like i said, i only did that shit once, and it was because we were on a half hour lunchbreak. first and hopefully the last time i do that shit.

[Capt]

i have my own collection of pipes so i never have to make a ghetto apparatus

chips ahoy cookie bars are fucking delicious

[The Judas Cow]

Well la-de-da

Can I have cookie bar?

[dionysusolympus]

:woo: :woo: :woo:

[greg]

dio, you're a dick

[Keith Moon]

- :penanner:

[KenKill75]

dio, you're a dick

deja vu