Quotes

[JTMoney]

Quote from your fav. movies :cheers:

[Hailo]

thats's what I'm talkin about

nepoleon dynamite

[JTMoney]

one tubby tubby , tow tubby tubby

from major pain

[Hailo]

FUCKING BITCHES


dazed and confused

[Darken Elise]

There is no spoon.

The Matrix

[greg]

i know kung fu

[Darken Elise]

lol!!!

[The Judas Cow]

There is no spoon.

The Matrix
:ha: I love that one.

[greg]

http://img79.exs.cx/img79/7214/bitch.gif

[The Judas Cow]

We were raised on television to believe that we'd all be millionares, movie gods, rock stars, but we won't. And we're starting to figure that out.


Fight Club

[JDMCivicHatch96]

SPOOOOON!!!! - The Tick... i know its not a movie, but its funny
I fucking hate you - Red vs. Blue... not a movie, but funny
Why dont you go play a game of hide and go fuck yourself - cant remember
Son of a bi.. thats gonna leave a mark! - Tommy Boy

[dionysusolympus]

Do you think that's air you're breathing? - The Matrix

Meet my little friend... - Scarface

I am your father.
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!! - Good pulp moment from Star Wars...

Suck! Suck! Suck! - Spaceballs

My girlfriend is a dog - Ghostbusters

...and some others...

[Darken Elise]

Go get her, Ray. - Ghostbusters
We're gonna need a bigger boat. - Jaws
Stop the press, who's that? - Batman

and, I love this one:
I was thinking of the immortal words of Socrates, when he said, "I drank what?" - Real Genius

[greg]

no ticket

/indiana jones and the last crusade & dogma

[The Judas Cow]

Do something!

-Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back

[greg]

salsa shark. man goes into cage, cage goes into salsa, shark's in the salsa.

/clerks

[Parabola7001]

JOKER: Is that you, John Wayne? Is this me?

HARTMAN: Who said that? Who the fuck said that? Who's the slimy little communist shit twinkle-toed cocksucker down here, who just signed his own death warrant? Nobody, huh?! The fairy fucking godmother said it! Out-fucking-standing! I will P.T. you all until you fucking die! I'll P.T. you until your assholes are sucking buttermilk. Was it you, you scroungy little fuck, huh?!

COWBOY: Sir, no, sir!

HARTMAN: You little piece of shit! You look like a fucking worm! I'll bet it was you!

COWBOY: Sir, no, sir!

JOKER: Sir, I said it, sir!

HARTMAN: Well ... no shit. What have we got here, a fucking comedian? Private Joker? I admire your honesty. Hell, I like you. You can come over to my house and fuck my sister. You little scumbag! I've got your name! I've got your ass! You will not laugh! You will not cry! You will learn by the numbers. I will teach you. Now get up! Get on your feet! You had best unfuck yourself or I will unscrew your head and shit down your neck!

HARTMAN: What's your excuse?

COWBOY: Sir, excuse for what, sir?

HARTMAN: I'm asking the fucking questions here, Private. Do you understand?!

COWBOY: Sir, yes, sir!

HARTMAN: Well thank you very much! Can I be in charge for a while?

COWBOY: Sir, yes, sir!

HARTMAN: Are you shook up? Are you nervous?

COWBOY: Sir, I am, sir!

HARTMAN: Do I make you nervous?

COWBOY: Sir!

HARTMAN: Sir, what? Were you about to call me an asshole?!

COWBOY: Sir, no, sir!

HARTMAN: How tall are you, Private?

COWBOY: Sir, five foot nine, sir!

HARTMAN: Five foot nine? I didn't know they stacked shit that high! You trying to squeeze an inch in on me somewhere, huh?

COWBOY: Sir, no, sir.

HARTMAN: Bullshit! It looks to me like the best part of you ran down the crack of your mama's ass and ended up as a brown stain on the mattress! I think you've been cheated!

HARTMAN: Where in hell are you from anyway, Private?

COWBOY: Sir, Texas, sir!

HARTMAN: Holy dogshit! Texas! Only steers and queers come from Texas, Private Cowboy! And you don't look much like a steer to me, so that kinda narrows it down! Do you suck dicks!

COWBOY: Sir, no, sir!

HARTMAN: Are you a peter-puffer?

COWBOY: Sir, no, sir!

HARTMAN: I'll bet you're the kind of guy that would fuck a person in the ass and not even have the goddam common courtesy to give him a reach-around! I'll be watching you!

HARTMAN: Did your parents have any children that lived?

PYLE: Sir, yes, sir!

HARTMAN: I'll bet they regret that! You're so ugly you could be a modern art masterpiece! What's your name, fatbody?

PYLE: Sir, Leonard Lawrence, sir!

HARTMAN: Lawrence? Lawrence, what, of Arabia?

PYLE: Sir, no, sir!

HARTMAN: That name sounds like royalty! Are you royalty?

PYLE: Sir, no, sir!

HARTMAN: Do you suck dicks?

PYLE: Sir, no, sir!

HARTMAN: Bullshit! I'll bet you could suck a golf ball through a garden hose!

PYLE: Sir, no, sir!

HARTMAN: I don't like the name Lawrence! Only faggots and sailors are called Lawrence! From now on you're Gomer Pyle!

PYLE: Sir, yes, sir!

HARTMAN: Do you think I'm cute, Private Pyle? Do you think I'm funny?

PYLE: Sir, no, sir!

HARTMAN: Then wipe that disgusting grin off your face!

PYLE: Sir, yes, sir!

HARTMAN: Well, any fucking time, sweetheart!

PYLE: Sir, I'm trying, sir.

HARTMAN: Private Pyle, I'm gonna give you three seconds--excactly three fucking seconds--to wipe that stupid-looking grin off your face, or I will gouge out your eyeballs and skull-fuck you! One! Two! Three!

PYLE: Sir, I can't help it, sir!

HARTMAN: Bullshit! Get on your knees, scumbag! Now choke yourself! Goddamn it, with my hand, numbnuts!! Don't pull my fucking hand over there! I said choke yourself! Now lean forward and choke yourself!

[JTMoney]

[Ezekiel 25:17 among others]
Jules: The path of the righteous man is beset on all sides by the inequities of the selfish and the tyranny of evil men. Blessed is he, who in the name of charity and good will, shepherds the weak through the valley of darkness, for he is truly his brother's keeper and the finder of lost children. And I will strike down upon thee with great vengeance and furious anger those who would attempt to poison and destroy my brothers. And you will know my name is the Lord when I lay my vengeance upon thee.

[JTMoney]

pulp fiction babys

[KenKill75]

Scarface:

-"How'd you get that beauty scar tough guy, eating pussy?"
-"Now how am I gonna get a scar like that eating pussy?"

Even better is the TV version:

-"How'd you get that beauty scar tough guy, eating pineapple?"
-"Now how am I gonna get a scar like that eating pineapple?"


Scarface:

-"This town is like a great big pussy waiting to get fucked"

Again, the TV version cracks me up:

-"This town is like a great big chicken waiting to get plucked"

[Jonesy]

Will: Do you like apples?

Yeah...

Will: well i got her number, how do you like them apples?
Good Will Hunting

Donnie: First of all, Papa Smurf didn't create Smurfette. Gargamel did. She was sent in as Gargamel's evil spy with the intention of destroying the Smurf village, but the overwhelming goodness of the Smurf way of life transformed her. And as for the whole gang-bang scenario, it just couldn't happen. Smurfs are asexual. They don't even have reproductive organs under those little white pants. That's what's so illogical, you know, about being a Smurf. What's the point of living if you don't have a dick?
Donnie Darko

Andy Dufresne: I had to go to prison to become a criminal.
Shawshank Redemption

[greg]

no matter where you go, there you are.

/ buckaroo bonzai

[bdf]

Jules Pulp Fiction: "Oh, I'm sorry.....did I break your concentration?"

Han Star Wars IV: "Better her than me!" AND--"A droid doesn't rip the arms out of people's sockets when they lose. Wookies are known to do that."

Leia Star Wars IV: "You came here in THAT thing? You're braver than I thought." AND--"Would somebody get this walking carpet out of my way?"

Mike The Deer Hunter: "Stanley, this is THIS."

Elizabeth I Elizabeth: "I will have one mistress here, and NO master!"

Brody Jaws: "Chum this, asshole!" AND--"We're gonna need a bigger boat." AND--"Smile, you son of a bitch!"

[Ryan]

on the entrance exam for new policemen they ask, "what are rabies and what would you do for them?" ryan said, "rabies are jewish priests, and i would do anything i possibly could for them."

[bdf]

"Honey, I'm home." AND--"Heeeeeeeeere's Johnny!"

[Ryan]

In order for life to have appeared spontaneously on earth, there first had to be hundreds of millions of protein molecules of the ninth configuration. But given the size of the planet Earth, do you know how long it would take for just one of these protein molecules to appear entirely by chance? Roughly ten to the two hundred and forty-third power billions of years. And I find that far, far more fantastic than simply believing in a God.

[Ryan]

"Heeeeeeeeere's Johnny!"

:drool:

[bdf]

Juliet Heavenly Creatures: "All the best people have bad chests and bone diseases. It's all frightfully romantic!"

[dos]

no matter where you go, there you are.

/ buckaroo bonzai

:inlove:

[B]

used to be a bunch of assholes that lived in this part of the building here, but we systematically removed them like you would any kind of termite or roach.

[greg]

get in there you big furry oaf! i don't care what you smell!

/star wars ep. 4

[greg]

:inlove:
damn straight

[Trizzak]

All we need is a voluntary, free-spirited, open-ended program of procreative racial deconstruction.... everybody just gotta keep fuckin' everybody 'til they're all the same color.

Bulworth

[greg]

excuse me sir, your balls are showing.

/ace ventura 2

[Tzarina]

"...I keep gettin' older and these freshman girls stay the same age"

:roflmao:


"I wanna Dance"

:haha:


"Drop freshman bitches"


:lmao:


Dazed and Confused

[bleuMadonna]

You tiny-brained wipers of other people's bottoms -- Monty Python and the Holy Grail

Yeah, well I heard you couldn't hit water if you fell out of a fucking boat -- Bull Durham

Does Barry Manilow know you raid his closet ? -- The Breakfast Club

Cameron is so tight that if you stuck a lump of coal up his ass, in two weeks, you'd have a diamond -- Ferris Bueller's Day Off

[Agent]

"...I keep gettin' older and these freshman girls stay the same age"

:roflmao:


"I wanna Dance"

:haha:


"Drop freshman bitches"


:lmao:


Dazed and Confused
actually it's "That's what i love about these high school girls, i get older they stay the same age.

haha i wanna dance, that part is funny.


"I know it was you Fredo, You broke my heart, you broke my heart."

[Tzarina]

actually it's "That's what i love about these high school girls, i get older they stay the same age.

haha i wanna dance, that part is funny.


"I know it was you Fredo, You broke my heart, you broke my heart."
Meh. it's the entire "hearing Matthew saying that in my head" thing... that has to be one of the funniest damn lines I have ever heard!
God I love that movie, if I had :weed: I'd watch it right now...
always makes a Bad time better...
"watch the leather man" :haha:


Tommy Boy as well...

[bleuMadonna]

"It's K-K-K-K-Ken, c-c-c-c-coming to k-k-k-k-kill me." A Fish Called Wanda

[Antoni30]

"We're gonna have the hap-hap-happiest Christmas since Bing Crosby tap-danced with Danny Fuckin' Kaye! Hallelujah! Holy Shit!....where's the tylenol?"



"When Santa squeezes his fat ass down the chimney, he's gonna see the happiest bunch of assholes this side of the Mississippi."


National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation

[jazz]

"We're gonna have the hap-hap-happiest Christmas since Bing Crosby tap-danced with Danny Fuckin' Kaye! Hallelujah! Holy Shit!....where's the tylenol?"



"When Santa squeezes his fat ass down the chimney, he's gonna see the happiest bunch of assholes this side of the Mississippi."


National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation

i :heart: that movie. :lol:

[Antoni30]

i :heart: that movie. :lol:


It's a classic!


"Merry Christmas! Shitter's full!"

[bleuMadonna]

LOL, I haven't seen that movie in years...I should rent it.

[MAGO]

Oh! Oh! Oh!....that feels so good!

"1 night in Paris" :gap:

[EtchedInCold]

never seen it.

[Mufumonk]

"Hey, try not to suck any dick on the way through the parking lot!" - Clerks

"Then one day she meets this John Holmes motherfucker and it's like, whoa baby, I mean this cat is like Charles Bronson in the Great Escape, he's digging tunnels. Now, she's gettin' the serious dick action and she's feeling something she ain't felt since forever. Pain. Pain. It hurts her. It shouldn't hurt her, you know her pussy should be Bubble Yum by now, but when this cat fucks her it hurts. It hurts just like it did the first time. You see the pain is reminding a fuck machine what it once was like to be a virgin. Hence, "Like a virgin."" - Resevoir Dogs

"You want subversion on a massive level. You know what one of the greatest fucking scripts ever written in the history of Hollywood is? Top Gun. Top Gun is fucking great. What is Top Gun? You think it's a story about a bunch of fighter pilots. It is a story about a man's struggle with his own homosexuality. It is! That is what Top Gun is about, man. You've got Maverick, all right? He's on the edge, man. He's right on the fucking line, all right? And you've got Iceman, and all his crew. They're gay, they represent the gay man, all right? And they're saying, go, go the gay way, go the gay way. He could go both ways. Kelly McGillis, she's heterosexuality. She's saying: no, no, no, no, no, no, go the normal way, play by the rules, go the normal way. They're saying no, go the gay way, be the gay way, go for the gay way, all right? That is what's going on throughout that whole movie... He goes to her house, all right? It looks like they're going to have sex, you know, they're just kind of sitting back, he's takin' a shower and everything. They don't have sex. He gets on the motorcycle, drives away. She's like, "What the fuck, what the fuck is going on here?" Next scene, next scene you see her, she's in the elevator, she is dressed like a guy. She's got the cap on, she's got the aviator glasses, she's wearing the same jacket that the Iceman wears. She is, okay, this is how I gotta get this guy, this guy's going towards the gay way, I gotta bring him back, I gotta bring him back from the gay way, so I'll do that through subterfuge, I'm gonna dress like a man. All right? That is how she approaches it. Okay, now let me just ask you - I'm gonna digress for two seconds here. I met this girl Amy here, she's like floating around here and everything. Now, she just got divorced, right? All right, but the REAL ending of the movie is when they fight the MIGs at the end, all right? Because he has passed over into the gay way. They are this gay fighting fucking force, all right? And they're beating the Russians, the gays are beating the Russians. And it's over, and they fucking land, and Iceman's been trying to get Maverick the entire time, and finally, he's got him, all right? And what is the last fucking line that they have together? They're all hugging and kissing and happy with each other, and Ice comes up to Maverick, and he says, "Man, you can ride my tail, anytime!" And what does Maverick say? "You can ride mine!" Swordfight! Swordfight! Fuckin' A, man!" - Sleep With Me

[jazz]

It's a classic!


"Merry Christmas! Shitter's full!"

my favorite part is when chevy chase goes downhill and through traffic on that plate.

:lmao:

[mud_]

Clifford Worley: You're Sicilian, huh?
Coccotti: Yeah, Sicilian.
Clifford Worley: Ya know, I read a lot. Especially about things... about history. I find that shit fascinating. Here's a fact I don't know whether you know or not. Sicilians were spawned by niggers.
Coccotti: Come again?
Clifford Worley: It's a fact. Yeah. You see, uh, Sicilians have, uh, black blood pumpin' through their hearts. Hey, no, if eh, if eh, if you don't believe me, uh, you can look it up. Hundreds and hundreds of years ago, uh, you see, uh, the Moors conquered Sicily. And the Moors are niggers.
Coccotti: Yes...
Clifford Worley: So you see, way back then, uh, Sicilians were like, uh, wops from Northern Italy. Ah, they all had blonde hair and blue eyes, but, uh, well, then the Moors moved in there, and uh, well, they changed the whole country. They did so much fuckin' with Sicilian women, huh? That they changed the whole bloodline forever. That's why blonde hair and blue eyes became black hair and dark skin. You know, it's absolutely amazing to me to think that to this day, hundreds of years later, that, uh, that Sicilians still carry that nigger gene. Now this...
[Coccotti busts out laughing]
Clifford Worley: No, I'm, no, I'm quoting... history. It's written. It's a fact, it's written.
Coccotti: [Laughing] I love this guy.
Clifford Worley: Your ancestors are niggers. Uh-huh.
[Starts laughing, too]
Clifford Worley: Hey. Yeah. And, and your great-great-great-great grandmother fucked a nigger, ho, ho, yeah, and she had a half-nigger kid... now, if that's a fact, tell me, am I lying? 'Cause you, you're part eggplant.
[All laugh]

true romance

[bdf]

Frank Hopkins, Hidalgo: "Once you get past the legs, they ain't too bad."
Master Chief Urugayle GI Jane: "What a goat fuck. I'll never live this one down."

[Mufumonk]

Boondock Saints

Connor: Now you will receive us.
Murphy: We do not ask for your poor, or your hungry.
Connor: We do not want your tired and sick.
Murphy: It is your corrupt we claim.
Connor: It is your evil that will be sought by us.
Murphy: With every breath, we shall hunt them down.
Connor: Each day we will spill their blood, 'til it rains down from the skies.
Murphy: Do not kill. Do not rape. Do not steal. These are principles which every man of every faith can embrace.
Connor: These are not polite suggestions, these are codes of behavior, and those of you that ignore them will pay the dearest cost.
Murphy: There are varying degrees of evil. We urge you lesser forms of filth, not to push the bounds and cross over, in to true corruption, into our domain.
Connor: For if you do, one day you will look behind you and you will see we three, and on that day you will reap it.
Murphy: And we will send you to whatever god you wish.
Il Duce: Never shall innocent blood be shed, yet the blood of the wicked shall flow like a river. The Three shall spread their blackened wings and be the vengeful striking hammer of God.

[bdf]

Lindsey The Abyss: "So....who thinks that was a Russian water tentacle? ... No?"

[greg]

i'm a drac!

http://www.dark-movies.de/EnemyMine/EnemyMine-2.jpg

[Heath]

"...I keep gettin' older and these freshman girls stay the same age"

:roflmao:


"I wanna Dance"

:haha:


"Drop freshman bitches"


:lmao:


Dazed and Confused





Damn you. Messing upa Dazed and Confused quote. :brick:

[bdf]

"I don't give a fuck about your war....OR your President."--Snake Plissken (Kurt Russell), Escape From New York

[Trizzak]

[Ron, Brian, Champ and Brick drive to the observatory]
Champ Kind: I love you, Ron.
[pause]
Champ Kind: I said I love you, Ron.
[pause]
Champ Kind: Why is everyone ignoring me? I love you, Ron! And I think we should adopt a child together in Vermont! ……. Answer me!
Ron Burgundy: Um... so... uh... the... the car's running great.
Brian Fantana: Hm? Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah...
Ron Burgundy: Take it for a tune-up?
Brian Fantana: Yeah.
Ron Burgundy: Uh-huh.
Brian Fantana: Changed the oil...
Ron Burgundy: Good!
Brian Fantana: And, uh...
Champ Kind: [shouts] Answer me! Ron! Ron, I know you heard me. I love you... and I want to be with you... like men. I want to be inside you. I want you inside me.
Brian Fantana: All right, anybody up for the radio?
Ron Burgundy: I would love to hear the radio.
Brick Tamland: Yeah.
Champ Kind: [shouts] No radio! I have something to say to Ron! You know I've had feelings for you for a long time! We'd be good together, Ron, I-I-I'm a good cook. Uh... do you like your feet rubbed? I'll bet you do. I'll-I'll rub 'em, and, uh, maybe we could get married in a ceremony presided over by Roger Staubach - I already called him last week, I hope that's okay with you.
Ron Burgundy: …Mexican food on me?
Brian Fantana: Hey, that sounds good.
Brick Tamland: Yeah, burrito!
Ron Burgundy: Okay.
Champ Kind: Say it! Say "Champ Burgundy," say it!
Brick Tamland: Tostada.
Ron Burgundy: Uh, tostadas would be great!
Champ Kind: [shouts] I am in love with Ron Burgundy! I'm always thinking about you, Ron! I have dream journals about you - filled pages! When I make love to women, I close my eyes and think of you when I finish! [sings] “Ron Burgundy is in love with me!
Ron Burgundy and Champion Kind, oh, let's... be so beautiful together, running in the grass, in the summer and the fall, and winter time too..."
Ron Burgundy: How much longer do you think, Brian?
Brian Fantana: It’s gotta be another 5 minutes, the problem is the altitude.
Ron Burgundy: Right.
Champ Kind: Ron? … I know you can hear me. I wanna…I wanna kiss you on the mouth. *leans forward* I wanna… Ron… Ron… *kisses Ron on cheek* Ron…
Ron Burgandy: It’s good to get my parking spot back.
Champ Kind: [shouts] I love you! Don’t ignore me. I am in love with Ron Burgundy!

[bdf]

"It's always so sad when a friend goes crazy... and you have to have a big clambake and COOK him... I'll get the water boiling!" -- Bender, Futurama